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Valentine’s Day is a very special occasion designed to celebrate love and totally, completely f*** with our heads.
If you’re single, Valentine’s Day is a sad, sad reminder that you’re alone. You have to get the perfect gift and arrange the most romantic possible night.
‘If you’ve fallen for one another in a big way and you both know it, then you might love the opportunity to spend a day celebrating your new-found love,’ Selina told us.
‘But if you’re taking it slow and seeing how things go, then you might want to give a light-hearted nod towards Valentine’s Day – a jokingly cheesy card or a chocolate heart.’ Essentially, if you and the person you’re dating have been super mushy and romantic from the get-go, you’ll probably want to do something for Valentine’s Day.
I'd rather a guy show me his true colors early on. Guys think they "should" do something because we "expect" it.
But my preference is, do what you want, behave according to your instincts, and I'll make a decision based on that information.
When I asked him if we were going out properly he just said he ‘wasn’t there yet, and wasn’t even sure if he wanted a serious relationship.’ “I don’t want to push it as I have a really nice time with him.
Valentine’s Day is a function of time, or, f(♥x) = dirty weekend. Buy no flowers from a hospital gift shop after your grandpa’s hernia operation. You’ve a) used the word girlfriend out loud, b) found her stray underwear in your gym bag, and c) taken yourself off Tinder. To the baseline of flowers candy, add the Nice Dinner. Somewhere quiet—if a DJ is spinning beats to dry-hump to, save it for next weekend. You know that signature dish your last girlfriend liked? Think ambiance, candles, wine—and, hey, how about that, she’s already at your place when the bottle’s empty! You’ve met her folks, deleted pics of your ex, and she has several nude selfies of you with your face in them. Do not ask her what she wants—she wants everything she did before, only better, more, and harder.
What DID surprise me is that, after the initial chemistry rush, Janie settled into a low-intensity pseudo-relationship that didn’t leave her at all satisfied. If he doesn’t follow through fast enough or often enough, make a mental note: “Hmm… I may have casually seen my wife for the first 4 weeks of our relationship, but I would always email the next day to say I had fun.
Which is why I wasn’t at all surprised when she met a man only two weeks into our coaching sessions. Application of this made-up “rule” is surprisingly simple. He calls, he texts, he emails – you just “mirror” his efforts and give him enthusiasm and warmth every time.
And secondly, because if you didn’t exchange gifts over Christmas, you haven’t yet hit the gift-exchanging stage.
It’s an easy way to figure out the Valentine’s Day conundrum, basically, with a simple, black and white rule. Project Love‘s Selina Barker reckons Valentine’s Day celebrations all depend on how the new relationship is going.
I’m not judging – I can see how easy it is to get into that situation.